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Are You Giving Away Your Power?

Are you? Are you aware of how often you give away your very own power? Are you aware that your power is limitless and no matter how empty you feel, you can feel on top of the world in an instant?

When we aren’t conscious about it, we give away our power in so. many. ways.

Case in point:

  • Someone is rude to you and you feel offended. I mean, how could they?!
  • You’re trying to make a coffee order and the server treats you halfheartedly while smiling enthusiastically at someone else. Really?
  • The customer service rep doesn’t seem to respect your situation. I can’t even…
  • Your boss/client says something in passing and you can’t seem to stop thinking about what they said. What’s wrong with me? Am I a failure?
  • It’s a month into your new diet and the scale doesn’t seem to agree. Why do I feel like a loser?
  • A beautiful, young woman seems to have everything going for her while you happen to be in your rumpy old work out clothes. Don’t go there, don’t go there…

While these may not all apply to you, the point of the examples above was to reflect the ways in which we give away our power so easily. To others, to objects, and yes, even that small anxious voice in our very own heads.

The first step in harnessing our own power is simple yet requires training and discipline.

It’s self realization.

Have you actually tried to count the ways you give away your power in a single day. I bet you’d be surprised at what comes up 😉

Try it! Set an alarm each hour and track the moments of the past 60 minutes in which you felt annoyed, depressed, stressed, or worried. At the end of the day, you may notice an overarching theme or two… or three.

You see, most of the “why’s” in which we give away our power stems from old beliefs or anchored fears. What do I mean by that? Here are a few examples:

  • I’m never good enough
  • People don’t respect me
  • What if I don’t make it?
  • I’m not loveable
  • I’m emotionally weak
  • I appear to be too powerful
  • People don’t listen to me
  • I get sick too easily
  • People always seem to leave me
  • I’m “fat” or I’m “too skinny”

This list can go on forever… that’s how smart and powerful our minds are. If we aren’t careful we can be chasing this wild rabbit for YEARS.

I can’t tell you enough how many people begin to expand their own awareness once they realize what their overarching themes are.

Once you realize what old beliefs and anchored fears are holding you back you begin to step OUT of the story and IN to your own power.

For the most deeply rooted fears and limiting beliefs there are several techniques that can be used to help offset the years of patterned behavior which I hope to write about soon. But for now, try the 24 hour journal. Get to know your self in a way that will change your life forever.

In wellness,

Suji

Do You Believe in Miracles?

Have you ever experienced a miracle? Something that completely changed your life in an instant?

What I’ve seen over and over again (and I love witnessing this in my own life as well) is that once you believe in miracles you naturally begin to live in the present moment. The surrendering has already begun. The magic is already happening.

There comes a moment when you can’t seem to handle the fear, worry, stress, dilemma (whatever is causing suffering for you) and you almost, in defeat, let it go.

That’s the beautiful part.

Suddenly you sense a lightness. And you realize it was never in your control anyway. It was never yours to begin with. How funny is that?

Our minds are powerful. And unfortunately (or fortunately) you can’t believe in two things. You can’t believe in fear AND believe that miracles can occur. You must choose one or the other, and for as long as you are trapped in your own fear, there can’t possibly be a way to witness a miracle.

That’s when you allow the down to be down. Don’t resist, just let it be. Because the sooner you relinquish control, the sooner you come to realize control isn’t the answer.

Life can be funny, but what I’ve come to realize as truth, is that it’s all perspective and beliefs at the end of the day.

What lens are you wearing today?

What driving belief is charting the course of your past, today, and subsequent future?

Choose wisely my friends. Be conscious and spend some time with your inner most wisest self.

In wellness,

Suji

The Paradise Dilemma

I’m in Seoul for some much needed family time and I told myself I would stay away from technology.. but wanted to share what I call the Paradise Dilemma. Before I get into that though can we talk about how beautiful this city is? Today I felt the first REAL day of Fall! There was a certain crispness in the air and I can tell by the way the light is hitting the trees our Earth is shifting into Autumn. It’s beautiful. Despite everything that is going on in this country the people continue to be vivacious, kind, and ever so generous…

The other day one of my closest friends happened to have an overnight layover in Seoul and it was as if the 6 months that went by without talking to one another never even existed. We walked to at an adorable cafe in Bukchon village and had the biggest serving of Jeju green tea bingsoo (shaved ice) and chatted away until it was time for our next meal!

What I love about our friendship is that we get it. Despite the sometimes worried tone of the updates the truth is we get what’s really happening – that we are held always, that we are the master of our thoughts.

That’s where the Paradise Dilemma comes into play. You see, once our basic needs are met (food, shelter, saftey) we’re in paradise and suddenly our ego believes there’s always something better and bigger leaving us in a state of continuous wonderment as to whether or not this is actually true. Some thoughts that may leave you in this dilemma can be as simple or as complex as:

  • Is there someone better out there? (as you are in a steady relationship)
  • Could I be living a more exciting life?
  • Is this the job I’m really meant to have?
  • I wish I had a better community where I am truly accepted.
  • And the thoughts go on and on as you can imagine…

The problem doesn’t lie in the thought itself, it’s the slightest belief in the possibility that suddenly catapults us into some better, imaginary future.

Now, this doesn’t mean things are always black and white. There’s a fine line between buying into our a egoic thoughts and tapping into our truest potential.

So what’s the difference? How can we separate the two?

It’s detachment. It’s becoming aware of when you are identified with a story (even if it’s a future story). It’s knowing you are in heaven as we speak and the present is all there is. It’s giving your best with what you have and are capable of TODAY and surrendering all outcomes to your higher self. It’s understanding these thoughts are natural and giving them even more meaning just means you are breathing life into each passing thought. It’s understanding that the more you entertain and dwell in these worried thoughts it keeps you further and further away from one simple TRUTH – that the present is all we ever really have.

And just as important, it’s recognizing that what you are chasing is a feeling and for the most part that feeling can only be controlled by you and you alone. After all, when you acquire and/or achieve X there’s only a shinier, bigger, better object in the near future right?

That’s why I am so thankful for NLP, advancements in neuroscience and mindfulness. It’s our biggest protector against our own selves; that’s how smart we are!

With that said, I’m off to go on another urban hike through the city. Here’s to enjoying what is unfolding in each and every moment and being thankful for each and every breath we take.

In wellness,

Suji

Summer & Questions To Guide Inner Reflection

There’s something about going back home… While I grew up as an army brat with many “homes”, I consider Seoul and Tokyo my old stomping grounds. It’s where I spent more of my formative years.

As I head back to Seoul for a much needed break I can’t help but be thankful for Seattle. Since my re-entry this wonderful city has been a place where I met the most unexpected people; a place where I grew in ways I never thought I would. Guess it goes back to, “You never know what the Universe will provide if you surrender and let go of expectations.”

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Seattle Summer Nights

I’m looking forward to this break so that I can spend time with family and old friends. It will also be a time for inner reflection, and I won’t lie… there will be a few meetings sprinkled in here and there but when you put your highest intention in them it doesn’t feel like just a “meeting” if you know what I mean 😉

As we close out this Summer I urge you to take time for inner reflection. While everyone’s questions and time for reflection will be different, here are a few you can use to guide yourself:

  • What have been the consistent themes/thoughts these past 3-4 months?
  • What have I done to take action toward these themes/thoughts?
  • Am I in a place where I am ready to take action?
  • Who or What can help me take action? (i.e., books, meetups, teachers, coaches, etc.)
  • As I prepare for Fall, what do I need to close out to complete Summer?

May these next few weeks be filled with last minute bbqs, more laughter, and time spent with our loved ones.

Namaste,

Suji

Friday Focus – 8/25/17 {When You Can’t Stop The Stress}

“What do you do when you know what to do, but you can’t help but let the stress get to you?”

“The suffering comes when you resist the current situation. What are you trying to change?”

“I feel as if I know enough intellectually not to stress out too much about things, and knowing this should help me in most situations… but I keep stressing and the stressing is stressing me out even more!”

“What is the goal?”

“The goal is to stop stressing!”

“This goal cannot be achieved right now. You are fighting against the current flow of life. Fighting against the flow of life creates even more resistance. Turn your vision around and go with the flow. Stress? What is so bad about stress? It is our identified stories and fears around a situation that creates stress and therefore keep us in suffering. “Stress” is not what is driving you mad, it is your identification to something or someone”

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So much of our suffering comes from desiring a different “current situation”. Can we sit in THIS moment and feel the gratitude of our breath? The sun on our face? The ability to call our loved ones and tell them how much we love them? To hug our beloved dog? To walk outside in nature and feel the beating heart of Mother Earth?

If you find yourself identifying to the student above ask yourself these following questions:

  • What am I needing to change to feel better?
  • Can I have faith that this too shall pass?
  • Can I breathe and with each exhale deepen my faith in the Universe’s ability to handle things perfectly?

No matter the situation, let us find a bit of peace in knowing we are taken care of – always.

In wellness,

Suji

Seeking Confirmation

Why do we do that? Whether it’s out of curiosity or we want to hear something other than what we know deep down inside, it’s as if us humans have an insatiable need to constantly seek confirmation outside ourselves.

On one hand if you have a healthy mindset about it, scratching a particular itch doesn’t hurt. I often find that when you’re honed in on your own intuition and your deepest desires you always know the answer and aren’t as stressed because you already have faith in the unfoldment of what is to be. Instead, what we mistaken as confirmation are really therapeutic experiences; after all as humans we love to be in community and what better way than to share and find a tribe of people who understand what you’re going through?

Where I think it can do more harm than good is when you constantly seek confirmation without giving anyone’s opinion or advice deep thought. When you feel the need to jump from one thing to another, stop and ask yourself, “what am I seeking?” “what do I want to hear?” “what am I afraid of?” “what is the underlying emotion that is driving my actions?”

Whether you’re in one boat or the other, consider relabeling what you are seeking. Rather than seeking “confirmation”, position your thoughts to identify with this activity as a “therapeutic experience” or a “discovery session”. Whether you do this with friends, a tarot/astrology reading, therapist, or life coach, when you identify this as therapeutic or a self discovery process suddenly the desperation falls away. Did you feel the shift? 

When we come from a place of seeking confirmation it implies a yearning for a particular goal, outcome, or indicates an illusory fear.

So the next time you feel the need to seek confirmation, take a moment to re-identify the action from seeking to discovery. It may make a world of difference and save you the stress.

And remember, you already have the answers within 💖

In wellness,

Suji

 

 

How Doing Something New Can Lead To Discovering A New Side Of You

As Summer slowly comes to an end so does my experiment with clay (but not for long…).

For as long as I can remember I’ve had a deep curiosity with this art form. For better or for worse, the timing never showed it’s prime opportunity so it wasn’t until this year, 2017, where I had a chance to take the dive into learning all things clay. And boy was it AMAZING.

Getting lost in how the clay feels, structuring the slabs, to learning how to center my first piece on the wheel were only some of the highlights from this Summer. I can’t tell you the amount of burst out loud laughs erupted from the studio as I and these newfound friends shared life stories.

I’m forever a proponent of switching things up, doing something new, and re-discovering yourself all over again, and I’m so glad clay was my form of outlet this Summer.

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This light…
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Making nature inspired cheese boards
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First firing
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Studio mate’s beautiful work
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Glazing
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Raku firing
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Finished pieces
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Lotus bowl
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Experimental Third Eye Cup
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Idaho Buff with simple glazes

I’ve found another form of meditation and a new part of myself through clay. This will certainly be a part of my life and I can’t wait to see how this new journey unfolds.

Here’s to trying new things and going after the small inklings we feel throughout our lives, because you never know what you might discover until you find out.

In wellness,

Suji

When You’re Stuck In Fear

Oftentimes when working with clients we come across a situation, and it could be the most mundane situation, and yet the mind can’t seem to loosen it’s grip on it.

Whether it’s from a traumatizing experience, or perhaps the client is already in a stressful situation, or maybe it’s hitting a very sensitive part of the client’s soul – a part of them that needs X to feel secure and safe.

Regardless of how hard the grip is we have to remind ourselves that our brain is programmed to behave this way thanks to how smart we are and the years of repetitive Miracle Combo’ing we do.

What is the Miracle Combo? MC is when you behave in such a way that actively engages the thought with a rush of feeling & emotion throughout the body while repeating this action until it begins to groove a new path in your neural network. It’s the Miracle Combo I’ve seen work over and over again whether you use it to define a new, positive neural pathway or hard-wire a negative pathway.

But back to fear. We need to realize fear is nothing but:

  • a familiar state we innately have within us
  • a state that needs to be acknowledged, not pushed away
  • a state that is trying to protect us

When we objectively look at what is causing us fear, it is typically not even in present RIGHT NOW. It is typically a future state our minds wander to and gets stuck with repetitive thinking.

Fear becomes bigger in our minds because it suddenly becomes the pure focus of our attention. Remember that phrase, “what you focus on grows”? Well, it’s true. So in order for this not to get any bigger than it actually is you need to acknowledge the fearful state and accept it. Instead, what most people do is try to control the fear, not think about the fear, or fix the problem.

Thankfully there are several NLP techniques and coaching frameworks (a hyper focused awareness session is one of my favorites for calming the mind and inducing beta/theta states) to help each individual person identify what works best for them when it comes to their unique fear. For one person it may be simple as shifting their unconscious attention by way of bilateral stimulation, or perhaps it’s tapping the meridians as a way to release stuck energy, or using self hypnosis to speak to the unconscious mind.

If you’re stuck in a fearful state just know there is a way to peace. Let this be a reminder to you that your LIGHT is much bigger than any fearful thought. That your fear is nothing but a small part of you that wants to seek and be in Love. That this fear doesn’t define who you actually are.

You are light. You are divine. You are whole. You are always held by something so much greater than we can possibly imagine.

With love,

Suji.

Uncertainty Over Certainty

I was driving to one of my favorite parks yesterday when a major theme struck me: why uncertainty is a far better approach than certainty.

Don’t get me wrong, there are moments where a bit of strategy is important (like what to pack for your 5 day hiking trip, or how about making sure you do your due diligence before buying the house of your dreams?), but for the majority of our day our brains are caught up in trying to ensure certainty in EVERY moment. And that can be tiring as hell!

Not only is this tiring our minds but it’s tiring our souls. It’s not allowing for rest. When we rest we are allowing the right side of our brain to be in FLOW with our deeper selves and Mother Nature; we are allowing space for something much bigger than we possibly could have imagined.

So why not lean in? Trust the flow. Surrender. Allow yourself to let go of the worries and thoughts that actually control YOU.

Notice how much lighter you feel. How there’s space for possibility. How suddenly you aren’t filled with fear and what if’s; instead, you’re noticing your breath and how wonderful this moment really is.

Try it out. Trust me. Lean into uncertainty and remember this: you are ok and will always be ok.

Namaste,

Suji

What To Do If You’re An Empath

  1. Do you find yourself feeling anxious, depressed, or flighty after meeting new people or being in a large group?
  2. Do you find it hard to get rid of these emotions you didn’t necessarily feel before?
  3. Do you oftentimes get confused as to whether or not you really feel any of this and find yourself questioning what is really going on?
  4. Do you feel like a pendulum when it comes to emotions? Feeling all the highs and all the lows?

If you responded yes to any of the questions above it could be an indication of your empathic nature. While it’s great to feel into situations and people so quickly, what’s not great is not knowing what to do when people shed all of their energy on to you to soak up.

As an Empath, you may not know what to do when it comes to releasing what’s not yours. Or may you do know what to do but it doesn’t seem to work.

While every Empath is different from one another, I thought I’d share a few techniques that work for me. Keep in mind you may need to try these techniques a couple of times in order to get used to a new technique or perhaps find a tweak that works perfectly for YOU.

  • Faster EFT. If you haven’t heard of tapping find someone who can teach you or ask Google to teach you. In my case, I found it immensely helpful to learn from someone. Essentially you are tapping on major meridian points along your face and chest to release the specific emotion or thought from the situation that is causing you to feel an undesired emotion. Imagine all the negative emotion draining away from your body! It’s astonishing how quickly it works and you can apply it to just about any situation you come across, not just empathic episodes.
  • Grounding/Earthing. I find this to be therapeutic as well. I wrote about Tree Medicine in an earlier blog post and there are many ways to ground yourself. Energetically we are surrounded my technology and of course other people’s energy and the Earth (think of a magnet) has the ability to absorb that which you don’t need. How wonderful is Mother Nature? Plant your bare feet into the sand, dirt, or grass. Feel the waves of relaxation come over you as you feel every drop of negative energy which does not serve you seeping into the ground beneath you. It’s Mother Nature’s caring way.
  • Connect to the Highest Love. This is by far my favorite and most impactful. Have you ever cried without even thinking about it when something touched your heart so much? Felt the pang of deep stirring within your heart from something you saw, felt, or read? This is connecting to the Highest Love. This kind of Love is so deep and so real you suddenly realize what you are carrying isn’t even REAL. What you are trying to rationalize in your mind doesn’t even MATTER. This Highest Love, which is in all of us, doesn’t care about what just happened, all it cares about is bringing you to the TRUTH of who you are, and only you know what this Truth is. You can connect to your Highest Love in a number of ways:
    • Hugging someone you deeply love and care about
    • Talking to God and letting him know how much you love him/her
    • Breathing deeply and getting still; knowing this Higher Love is within you always
    • Doing something you absolutely love for 15 minutes (yes 15 minutes); for me it’s working with CLAY
    • Last but not least any of the two suggestions above

At the end of the day don’t despair. Nothing is permanent in this world and neither are these feelings.

As humans it is our job to learn and evolve so if you’re new to your superpowers as an Empath or you’ve been on this journey and still trying to figure it out, just know you are fully capable of making positive change in your life. Surround yourself with your own network of guides and teachers, and most importantly believe change is possible.

In wellness,

Suji