This is probably one of the hardest lessons when it comes to the human mind… Often times when we have a desire for a certain outcome whether it be a job, weight on the scale, soulmate, car, whatever it may be… our minds have a way of knowing EXACTLY what we want and if not exact, it knows to be disappointed or elated (more disappointed than not) once you’ve reached a certain point in time.
I am often humbled and embarrassed when I remember the times I was so determined to make something work, only to have, what seemed at the time, the door shut in my face so fast and so hard I could have felt the physicality of it. Oh yes, anyone ever had that moment?
For example, there was a period in time when I was incredibly competitive in crossfit. I was doing the “Competitors” regimented workouts, I’d make sure to always fit in two hours of time before and after work to make it to the gym, a majority of my thoughts were based on what to eat for performance and what not to eat for looks (again competing goals which I wrote about here), and unfortunately, one of the recurring themes I’d find myself obsessively following in my head is the need to do and be more than I already was.
As time went on I became even more determined to “up my game” and made a list of new goals and tactics to achieve those goals in the next 6-9 months. However, remember I had mentioned the door shutting in my face so fast and hard I could almost feel it? You guessed it, adrenal fatigue.
It was a clear I needed to change everything in order to get something right and that something would end up being the best thing that ever happened to me. But would I have ever found it on my own? Possibly. Would it have been in the time frame I wanted? Probably not.
Looking back, I’ve come to realize the most easiest way out of this disappointment is gratitude and surrender.
What I learned thus far when it comes to expectations around ANYTHING, is to simply let it go. Yes, put it out there and if it’s bugging the bejeezus out of you put it in the God Box and trust it will be taken care of.
It is from THIS place you can finally let your mind rest in peace and live life with an ease and lightness that will allow you to truly be content with what you have already and who you are already; this will allow you the SPACE in which to be open to new ideas, perspectives, and inspiration but most importantly the space to be fully present and alive in this moment.
It is from this place you can live your life with ease. There is no pressure whatsoever and the energy coming back to you will be received from a different place as well and so you smile more, you worry less, and before you know it you are having fun! You are delighted in your moment to moment actions, thoughts, and emotions, and isn’t this what we all strive to have? The delight? The trust in the Universe? This deep connection to life?
Perhaps this is what then allows things to happen… and the beauty is that what happens is always more than you ever thought you wanted or imagined 🙂
Now back to what I wanted before adrenal fatigue. Before, I thought I wanted to be highly competitive while at the same time had the desire to lean out. What I’ve come to realize is that what I truly wanted was a deep sense of community with like minded people and to be happy with my body both physically and emotionally.
You might be wondering, so did it ever happen?
Yes, but it wasn’t until after complete surrender in both my physical actions and my thoughts I was able to A) realize what it is I truly needed and B) begin to enjoy life, my whole self, and this deep connection to life itself. 🙂